The OC Disorder

Thank you, Stumble.

"Hold my hand, Quaid. Open your mind... Open your mind."

So the other day I was driving around my home town and all of a sudden it hit me…

I REALLY HATE A LOT ABOUT ORANGE COUNTY!!!

Don’t get me wrong. There is a lot of redeeming values to Orange County, which is probably why I haven’t abandoned ship quite yet, but as I was sitting at a four-way-stop and almost witnessed four different accidents because of rude or just plain dumb Orange County drivers I got mad. Real Mad. And I started thinking about of the things like dumb drivers that I hate.

Well I decided to start a sort of “series” where I rant about these things and I will try to remember and update you with the things that have caught my attention.

So without further delay here is the first of many THINGS I HATE ABOUT YOU (Orange County):

#1 Insane Soccer Moms:

Now maybe this is more of a problem out here where I live in Yorba Linda, but I’m pretty sure we’ve all had the pleasure of witnessing or coming across one of these lovely ladies menacing around in their mini vans, SUVs, or ridiculously lifted trucks wreaking havoc on and off the road just so that they can get little Jimmy and Suzie to soccer practice, tae kwon do, etc.

I’m sure these ladies have a pretty hard life trying to make their children happy, but I’d rather not be disrespected or almost killed on a daily basis by them. I’m also a fond believer of adults acting like adults in situations where there may be a conflict.

You might be reading this thinking “Sean… aren’t you being a little dramatic about these women?”

To which my answer would be…  No. You are stupid and I am of course far superior and right when it comes to this subject matter.

Don’t believe me that these women suck? Well how about these little gems I found:

Lady Calls 911 Over Wrong Burger King Order (Laguna Niguel)

Woman A can’t park her SUV and Woman B confronts her about it. (Google Building, Irvine)

It’s sad to think that these women are raising the future of the world, our country, and this county…

Looks like the Mayans were right… the world is going to end very very soon.

Some interesting CNN reports today…

Pentagon says Chinese vessels harassed U.S. ship: The funniest detail?  “Because the vessels’ intentions were not known, Impeccable sprayed its fire hoses at one of the vessels in order to protect itself,” the statement said. “The Chinese crewmembers disrobed to their underwear and continued closing to within 25 feet.” I believe this constitutes a drunken frat party.

(Video) Obama does a little dance for Ted Kennedy: Obama shakes it at a belated birthday celebration for Kennedy, who’s being treated for brain cancer.  I’ve seen Obama dance.  NEXT!

Meghan McCain calls Coulter ‘offensive’ and ‘insulting’: Is Meghan McCoulter the voice of reason for the GOP or just a Democrat at heart?

America becoming less Christian: We’re becoming a secular socialist state!  Lyndon LaRouche was right!  I mean…Glenn Beck was right!

Unemployed! Economy in the tank! Doomed!

Comics are written and drawn for a reason.  I always felt the drawing is suppose to tell the joke itself or enhance the joke that’s in the dialouge.  If the art does nothing to contribute to the joke, then why even draw?  Just write a joke and save the time from drawing stick figures that do nothing!  This is why I hate 99% of web comics, like the popular xkcd and “Cyanide and Happiness.”

For instance, let’s look at the latest xkcd comic…

Read the rest of this entry »

OC Weekly’s Gustavo Arrelano puts the smackdown on John Hughes, the owner of The Filling Station in Orange.  Hughes was upset at Arrelano for saying his restaurant is expensive in a published review.  Hughes then left a comment saying Arrelano is a horrible reviewer and accuses the OC Weekly of payola–giving favorable reviews to businesses that buy ads.  As a occasional letter writer, let me offer you a tip for complaining: don’t make shit up.

Gustavo smartly uses data and stats to prove Hughes is full of shit about the payola claim.  Way to fail your business.  Even if Hughes is right by arguing that his business model can’t afford cheaper prices, he should’ve just said that and not make unwarrented accusations.  The best way for businesses to counter negative reviews and criticism is to assess the problem and decide if change will effectively benefit the business.  Otherwise, keep your mouth shut because you don’t control the microphone.  The publisher/author/reviewer always has the last word.

OC Weekly blog: Do OC Weely Food Critics Practice Payola?

The NY Times has a very cool, extremely high-resolution picture of Obama’s inaugural address, which is interactive so that various important people are highlighted when you mouse over them (like a tagged Facebook Photo).

However, while scanning around I noticed something strange.. who is sitting next to Bill and Hillary? Some Russian dignitary?  A fur trader? No, it’s George H.W. Bush.

After my fifth viewing, I started to laugh so hard, I was crying.  Ron pushed me to crying when he said “It’s like an army of Bachs.”

This has to be a joke.  If it is, it’s awesome.  Every guy is doing something different.  My favorites are the middle guy and the 3rd guy from the right. I can imagine what they said before they recorded…

“You do it normally.”
“You pretend to jump rope.”
“You don’t move your legs.”
“You….just dance.”

The Guardian: German lovers – aged six and five – try to elope to Africa

It is a dream that has been shared by lovers across the centuries – the chance to elope to exotic lands. But few would have been as bold and spontaneous as six-year-old Mika and his five-year-old sweetheart Anna-Bell who, after mulling over their options in secret, packed their suitcases on New Year’s Eve and set off from the German city of Hanover to tie the knot under the heat of the African sun.

The children left their homes at dawn while their unwitting parents were apparently sleeping, and took along Mika’s seven-year-old sister, Anna-Lena, as a witness to the wedding.